Sunday, December 9, 2018

The Joys of Therapy

I am resuming therapy next week to address my recent relapse and the issues that caused it. I'm looking forward to it; the work I was able to do the last time I was in therapy really was life-changing (for the better) for me. 

It occurred to me as I was thinking about it this afternoon that there is probably still a lot of stigma surrounding therapy for mental or emotional health. We, as a society, have no difficulty with going to physical, cardiac, or respiratory therapy; but often our collective heads go down in shame when we talk about going to therapy to improve our mental and emotional health. This is unnecessary, and probably harmful. Therapy can provide improvement in marriages, in parenting, in work life, in social life, and the ripple effect is that improved mental health usually results in improved physical health (thus lowering medical costs overall - learning ways to deal with stress through therapy is tons cheaper than open-heart surgery, and a lot safer too!). Therapy can also result in improved societal health - less drug abuse, spouse abuse, less crime in general - meaning that our police and emergency services are less taxed and better able to serve us. So, I'm not really seeing a downside here.

Stigma results from lack of knowledge, so I'm going to share the little bit that I know about therapy, mainly from my own latest experience. Again, people go to therapists for all sorts of reasons - certainly, therapy is warranted for past trauma that has not healed, or recent trauma, and of course individuals use therapy to manage chronic mental health conditions. Other reasons for going might be common life issues, such as couples' counseling, or parenting issues. There are also major change of life issues such as grief therapy or divorce therapy. Folks might go after retiring in order to find a new life purpose, and people go to learn how to deal emotionally with diseases such as cancer, or chronic diseases such as MS or fibromyalgia.  One doesn't need to be 'kooky' or 'weird' to seek the advice of a professional; one simply needs a desire to improve the quality of their life.

What happens in a therapist's office? This varies widely, depending upon the specialty of the therapist. Generally, 1:1 therapy lasts 50 minutes (a therapist's 'hour'). You and your therapist will probably set some goals that you determine, and then each session will be spent discussing issues that come up relating to your goals. A good therapist will allow the client to steer the boat, within certain parameters. A good therapist also spends more time asking questions and listening, rather than talking. A good therapist draws the answers out from their clients.  A therapist uses the therapy in which they are trained to guide their client toward their goals. In my opinion, if one's therapist is content to listen to a client ramble on for 50 minutes each week or however often, rehashing the same stuff over and over, that client would be better off talking to a bartender (unless you have an alcohol problem) - it'd be cheaper and you'd get the same results.

In Wisconsin, and probably all 50 states, everything said in the confines of the therapist's office is confidential, except if you have plans to harm yourself, someone else, or you are discussing child/elder abuse that you are perpetrating.

There are different levels of licensing for therapists and counselors. I'm not familiar enough with them all to list them here; however, a person can contact a counseling center and ask who would be best to help them with attaining their goals. There are many ways to find a counselor or therapist - through word of mouth, one's insurance company, one's county's Health & Human Services, or on the internet. The tough part can be finding one with whom one clicks. A person need not be afraid of 'shopping' - if a therapist is offended because you're not a good match, they're not a good therapist. This is your life, and your money - a therapist works for the client.

I'm looking forward to rejoining therapy - it's nice to be able to talk about things without embarrassment and know that they'll be left in that person's office, and I'm ready for moving life to a new level.

Namasté,

Ken