Another Milestone

Today I celebrate 18 months of recovery from alcoholism and depression. 

We celebrate milestones in recovery because, well, we just do. Each and every day I work at (sometimes play at) relapse prevention, and that's what a lot of recovery is - staying away from the next drink, or the next emotional or mental relapse. Learning how to live life on life's terms. Learning how to get along with myself and with others. Learning how to recognize and utilize my Higher Power. Learning how to live.

Milestones give us a chance to reflect back whence we came. I told my spiritual advisor this evening that I couldn't have even imagined being where I'm at today 18 months ago. And I certainly didn't have my eye on today 18 months ago - I had my eye on getting through this morning, this afternoon, this evening. I still don't think too far ahead - I don't seem to be too well equipped to do that yet. 

Milestones also give us a chance to let others know that they can recover, too. If I can do it, surely you can. Milestones are also the only objective measurement tool we have for recovery. I can measure the amount of time definitely between now and the last time I used alcohol or another mood-altering drug. In other words, I can say that I have abstained from alcohol for 18 months, but I'd be lying if I told you that I've been perfect in every other way since then as well. I will let you know that my character defects and maladaptive beliefs, which fueled my drinking and my mental illness, have lessened quite a bit, but they're still there.

The basic ingredients to recovery are still the same: surrender, humility, and willingness, borne out of desperation; then honesty, openmindedness, acceptance, faith, perseverance, and service to others. These basic ingredients have to be in my recovery 'cocktail', but the amounts vary from day to day.

Lastly, I want to let you know how grateful I am for you. Your presence, your support, your encouragement, your patience and compassion, and your kind words have saved this life, and I thank you.

Namaste,

Ken