Choosing My Battles

I found out today that a person I had the honor of serving recently lost their battle with addiction. It is a sad thing, and one wonders what more can be done. 

I used to think I knew everything. I certainly had an opinion about everything. The problem with knowing everything (for me, anyways) was that I knew everything but still didn't have any answers. I knew everything and life still sucked. I knew everything and I still sucked. 

When I stopped knowing everything, I became teachable. I began to learn. Today in my Certified Peer Specialist training I learned some more about addiction and recovery. I used to know everything about addiction; now that I don't, there is a lot more hope.

I spent years floundering and searching for what I should do with my life. When I stopped searching, and began to look at what is in front of me, I found out what is mine to do. What is mine to do is to use my experience in mental illness and alcoholism and my experience in recovery to help ease the suffering of others. Part of what is mine to do is to learn more and discover more about addiction, mental illness, and recovery. This isn't a dead-end street. There is so much to learn, and so much to explore. 

And what does this have to do with the young man who is no longer with us? Not much, anymore. But there are many more men and women who are in the grips of a potentially fatal illness who still have the hope of a living recovery inside. 

There's a lot going on in the world today. There's a lot going on that I have an opinion about, and a lot going on that I could try to say or do something about. I feel strongly about a lot of issues. However, this is mine to do: to keep recovery in the center of my life, and to know that a big part of my recovery is sharing it with others. My energy, my focus, must be on learning and doing as much as I can so that someone doesn't have to die from their mental illness or addiction. 

There's a poster behind me right now as I write that says, "FOCUS - If you chase two rabbits, both will escape." There's lots of things in this world, this life, that need attention. I must trust that Spirit has already provided the people needed for other issues, and focus on what is mine to do. Because I don't want my clients to die, and there's maybe something I can do about that.

Namaste,

Ken